Slingshot Records Blog

Found this on Digg.com — Too funny. (Trackback added)

From John Cleese’s “Letter to America” (Speaking of Presidential madness):
In view of your failure to elect a competent President and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately.

To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect (a few excerpts):

4. Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels (look up “vocabulary”). Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as “like” and “you know” is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication.

7. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday. November 2nd will
be a new national holiday, but to be celebrated only in England. It will be called “Come-Uppance Day.”

12. The Former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling “gasoline”) - roughly $8/US per gallon. Get used to it.

20. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty’s Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due, backdated to 1776.

Rick’s response to Mr. Cleese:
Oh yeah… taxes…. that started this whole independence thing, didn’t it? (Can you say “Boston Tea Party”… That’s back when Boston was cool… well, they did give us Aerosmith… Thanks). Let that be a warning to the “tax and spend” politicians… ENOUGH ALREADY WITH THE TAXATION… GET YOUR HANDS OUT OF OUR WALLETS!!

From AP 02/10/08
BAGHDAD — A diary and another document seized during U.S. raids show some Al Qaeda in Iraq leaders fear the terror group is crumbling, with many fighters defecting to American-backed neighborhood groups, the U.S. military said Sunday.

From AP 02/11/08
QUETTA, Pakistan — Pakistani security forces critically wounded a top figure in the Taliban militia fighting U.S. and NATO forces in Afghanistan, one of six militants captured after a clash near the border Monday, the army said.

Mansoor Dadullah, brother of slain Taliban military commander Mullah Dadullah, and the five others were challenged by security forces as they crossed from Afghanistan into Pakistan’s southwestern province of Baluchistan. They refused to stop and opened fire, said army spokesman Maj. Gen. Athar Abbas.

“Security personnel returned fire. As a result, all of them sustained injuries and all of them were captured,” Abbas said. “Dadullah was arrested alive but he is critically wounded.”

What a wild presidential campaign season!!! I’m seeing where Hilary’s campaign manager is resigning. And, Obama (the man with the grand platitudes) has won several states over the weekend (That’s your que to start singing: “The Cult Of Personality” by Living Color) - Though, I must say it’s kind of fun watching Hillary squirm - since so many people said “this is her year.” Whoopie has said on The View that she’s changing her vote from Obama to Hillary because Hillary was the 1st candidate to say that she’ll stop jobs from going overseas. Then there’s Howard Stern and Robin Quivers saying they think Ron Paul is making the most sense. And, Romney’s has suspended, but is not out of the race? To top it all off Ann Coulter is vowing to campaign for Hillary because she feels Hillary is more conservative than McCain. Partly due to Hillary’s support of GITMO, and because Ted Kennedy has endorsed Obama… so Ann thinks the Clinton’s will no longer be “arm in arm” with the ultra left liberals.

Will the madness end?

What cracks me up is that Democrats have a chance to show that they’re “strong on National security” because several years ago (2004) they opined that Iraq needed more boots on the ground. Now, the surge is working, but because they hate Bush so much they’ve appear to have totally forgotten that they made a quality war time, battle field suggestion. They should be shouting from the roof tops “now that’s how you win a war”, but they’re seem too pre-occupied with cuttin’ and runnin’… and shamin’ our president, country, and troops. (Now that’s your que to start singing Metallica’s “Sad but true”).

(It’s sort of La Vida Loca) - I was speaking with a new friend of ours the other day. He shared with me that he works with mentally challenged children. He made a statement that has altered how I see life… permanently. He said that he truly enjoys his work because all of the children that he works with approach life with ABSOLUTELY NO MALICE IN THEIR HEARTS… with complete purity. How odd, yet beautiful to my ears.

Man… to live like that. I stumble as I try putting that into practice…
it’s difficult, but liberating… and worth it…

and, I hope pleasing to the Lord.

I listened to the Dave Ramsey’s radio show yesterday. He spoke about the “recession”…. or lack there of… A recession is defined by 2 quarters reversed/negative economic growth. That’s not happening at this time. The “Fed” (Wednesday 01/17/08) has said the current US economic picture is SLOW growth - (around 1.5% as opposed to the 3+% that we’ve enjoyed over the last few years). SLOW growth is not a “recession.” It’s just SLOW economic growth. That’s all. But, the media/politicians want us to believe different… so they can ride in on their “white horse” and help us through this “recession.” Oh.. they had the insight to “see it coming” and will guide us through it. Ha!

Funny, Mr. Ramsey mentioned how the Stock Market happens to be down… and he said: “Hey!! It’s time to buy!!”

What is a family? Other than being the God ordained institution designed to be a refuge from the evils of this world, and by which we help our offspring hopefully replicate Godly traits generation after generation… I like to reckon it somewhat to a miniature circus. Semi-controlled chaos. Shoes, clothes, and toys on the floor and sometimes strange places like the… fridge, or mailbox. High pitched screams of joy as the kids play with the dog in the den. Sniffles, colds, etc. Wacky schedules that sometimes work… and sometimes don’t. A miniature circus… the family clown, the family juggler, the family ring leader, the lion tamer, etc. All different talents coming together to make the miniature circus work in it’s own way. Finally, deep pains that no one would volunteer for, and amazing joys that no money could buy. Did I get that last line from a Hallmark card?

Mike Hamilton and I are avid Harley riders, my wife and I had gathered at Michael and Susan’s house one evening for dinner and conversation. Half way through the evening, I realized that Heidi and I had forgotten to give our cat Shadow his shot of insulin. Now we are usually very punctual or make a point to be very timely on his injections, For what ever reason, I got sidetracked on the time. Aware of this, I let everyone know that I had to leave, and would be back shortly. Michael offered to ride with me, and we took off. We were about a mile out from there house on to our place in the country which was about twenty miles away. As Michael and I were headed down a four lane road, I noticed a car coming at us in his lane, with sparks coming from his left front tire. As I am observing this potentially ugly incident unfold, the tire comes off the oncoming car, bounces off the bumper of the car that is front of us, and catapults over both of our heads. Now Michael is looking at me, and me at him, thinking that there is no way we just dodged the oncoming projectile by inches. Laughing nervously about the situation to myself, I just chalked that up as another lucky moment in, our lives. Looking back at it now, I am aware of the many Blessings that I have had in my Life. GOD wasn’t ready for me or Michael to leave this planet quite yet. I always saw things like that as pure luck. As I look back at incidents like that now, they have a completely different meaning. Michael has always told me that I have used up seven of my nine lives. I think I’ll keep the last two in reserve for better things.

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Rick,
In recent days, we’ve have been discussing releasing the old you and inviting GOD’S view. Sounds like the beginning of a song, Huh? Anyway, I’m coming to realize that the previous fifty years of my life needs to be thrown out. At best, I feel like a first grader trying to learn quantum physics, with a dash of rocket science thrown in. Listening to your experiences, although compelling leaves me at times in a vortex of, as Scooby-do would say: “HUHHHHAAAAEEE?” It has been really difficult for me to get my mind around believing in everything I can’t see, verses, everything I supposedly know. And, as you put it. Ya, how is that working for you. I can’t help but laugh sometimes looking in third person at myself, at what I know to be inherently right, but thinking there is a better way to approach my issues by human knowledge. If I would just relinquish myself to the Captain of the ship, it would probably be a lot smoother sailing. I consider myself now, as a work in progress, sometimes looking pretty ugly, and at other times thinking that’s not so bad.

It’s just an observation here:
that if we all would release all of that baggage we have, our journey may not be so arduous.

If you run your own small business you know that you ware 2 main hats to keep things operating:

Hat #1 is… well, Owner/Operator. That means you and/or your employees make sure all aspects of your business are handled. But, at the end of the day the buck starts and stops with you. This can be a little unnerving. But, them’s the breaks.

Hat #2 is the glorified, catch all, complaint department. Everyone associated with your business comes to you with every problem (business and personal). Below is a list of paraphrased conversations of some true issues that have been laid in my lap as a small business owner.

* I’m not sure if I can make play at that show… I can’t find a baby-sitter.
* You mean we’re traveling 2 states away to perform and there’s no PA or light- show?
* The hard-drive has crashed, and the master back up was erased last month.
So, we’ll have to re-record all the basic tracks for all 12 songs.
* Please travel 12 hours to Philadelphia and open the concert for Natalie Grant…
but,we can only provide food & lodging.
* I’m sorry I’m late for the recording session… I’ve been in a motorcycle crash…
and, I’ve lost the feeling in my left arm.